You'd think that Dad is the only person we help out. That couldn't be anywhere near true! For the last 10.5 years we have a disabled mother. Her doctor's visits have been plentiful. I've taken her to 4 in the last month and Lori has taken her to the dentist and for shots prior to dental work.
Here's a recap of our doctor's visit this past Monday. First of all, I couldn'tCouldn’t use the drop off drive so had to park and push her up the hill and inside. Our first stop was the lab. Nobody told us she needed a urinalysis! Grrr! She'd already emptied her bladder before we loaded her up in the van AND collecting a urine sample from someone who can't stand very well or use a public stall very well is not easy. So we got the cup and label and will do it at home and return it. One stop down, one to go.
Why oh why don't these desks talk to each other! Every year every time we see a doc for the first time we have to do everything from scratch. They are in the same building and have computers. Come on, administrators, get with the program. Mom had difficulty with her phone number and address. She got the numbers transposed. Our wait wasn't too bad.
The nurse for the eye exam determined mom can see the outline of fingers/hands if held about 12 – 18 inches in front of her face – head level. Not side to side. Not up or down. She didn’t say anything just when testing that is where mom’s field of vision was. And she can’t distinguish much unless there is a contrast (dark/light).
Between the nurse and the doc, I was making small talk about a study I read this past week about brain function in Alzheimer’s patients. They study said playing brain games is helpful to keep from losing brain as quickly. Things like spelling bees and multiplication tables are popular with patients who have little ability to use their body. I told mom that’s something she could do to increase her brain power and stimulate her occipital nerves and lobes. She said she wants someone to read to her. I asked read what. She said the church bulletin but it is always thrown away before Mona can read it to her. She then said that’s all. I told her that Mona can read to her but she said Mona doesn’t like to read. I said oh well… listening to someone read is passive anyhow and won’t really do much for your brain.
Dr. Greer came in and reviewed her records then examined her eyes. She told him that everything is darker or dimmer than it used to be, that she tells dad the bedroom is too dark but he says it’s the same as it was. He told her as he did last time (but he was very polite) that the occipital lobes on both sides were impacted by the stroke (really, I just talked about the occipital lobes). Her eyes themselves are healthy. But the brain doesn’t read the signals that are transmitted to that part of her brain. She asked his nurse earlier and then asked him as well about stem cells. He told her that would be a question for her neurologist not him but as far as he knew there was no such treatment or research going on. He told her “I’m sorry, honey, but there isn’t any.” Very sweet to her and called her honey a few times. When he was about done, I interjected “Mom, you wanted to tell him about the feeling of sand in yours eyes since you are having to rub, use eye drops, and have dad blow in your eye.” She kind of snapped at me that does only blows in her eye when she thinks there is a hair in it. Dr. Greer said that is all dry eye issues and wrote down an OTC eye drop that she should use. He said if you get in the habit of doing them 4x daily, you don’t end up with the scratchy stuff as often. So he wrote it down and handed it to me. He told her he’d see her again in a year. And then he turned to me and said …. And I wish I had it on tape….. “thank you, you are a good caregiver.” I’ll be damned – someone other than the nail lady finally said that. He’s a saint now in my book!
I got mom’s jacket back on her, made her next appointment and all the other stuff related to going out. This time at least the push was down a hill rather than up. Much easier go down than up! When we arrived at the van some um... well.... stinker parked in the boxed/lined off section for ramps. The vehicle displayed a handicap tag and was full of crap cluttered but a decent model. I had to lift her over the edge (though she didn’t seem to notice) and lean on the car to push her in. I then got a Wal-Mart receipt out of my purse and wrote “sorry if I scratched your car but you parked too close and we couldn’t use the ramp properly.” Made me feel better and I think I left a wheel rub mark on the door. Anyhow, Mom then says – what did you put on the car? I said “you saw that – how?” She said my black coat against the white car gave her enough of an image. I told her it was a note not to park on the area for ramps.
I asked what she wanted for lunch and she hem hawed around about not wanting anything and then I asked what she would have at home and she said I don’t know. I said well I was getting you lunch so tell me what you’d like. She didn’t know and I told her all the places. I finally pulled over in a parking lot and called dad. He remember the big sandwich that Kris had bought and suggested it. Mom said she’d eat PB crackers and dad cursed in the phone when he heard it. So I asked him and he finally said a burger from Sonic. I asked about a chili cheese dog and he said oh, yeah, that sounds great. Mom said she’d eat onion rings. So I got to Sonic and get the order and their debit thing isn’t working but finally it did and we get home and I unload her. BLAH….. I bring in all the food and we all sit down. Mona with her rings, mom with her rings, dad with his coney and malt, and me with a burger and rings. First thing mom says is “they cooked these in fish oil.” I said “oh man, are they not good?” I bit into mine and they were find so I said so. She said no, they cooked them in fish oil but I’ll eat them.
She asked dad where he onion rings were. He put her hand on them. I asked her if she could see the onion rings if she held it out from her face. She said no. But she wasn’t looking down at them she was looking straight ahead. I said how about if you looked down so they are directly in your line of sight. She said she was not going to bend her head down because her neck hurt. I said ok, how about lifting up a ring and sticking it out from your face. She did it a few times but never answered me.
Then she asked dad if the chili on the coney was any good. He said not as good as the Sonic on Greenwood… I said well I didn’t know they were different so Mom said so and so’s relative worked there and they made their own chili and it was good. I said next time I’ll get the chili dog from that one then. Dad said it was pretty good. It’s the new quarter lb coney and he ate every bite. Then started on his malt. While sitting there, mom started in on purchasing a new van. I said “ you don’t need a new van… that one is perfectly fine.” She said she needed a lift. I told her that was foolish because we could load and unload. I told her she was like a kid at Christmas, as soon as she got a new toy it wasn’t good enough and she wanted something else. She said she wasn’t but that the van was no longer practical since she couldn't see. Mom thought she goes this week for protime and dad told her no. She was then saying she needed to call Dr. Swicegood to see if they have any cancellations so she can get her shot in her neck. I told her to be sure it was when Mona could load her or we could help or the kids could.
She then decided it was time to get her feet up so Dad scooted out of the way so she could get to the den. Mom calls out that she wanted to drink some of that tart cherry juice because Dr. Oz was talking about it again. So I made her a drink. I visited with Dad a bit and asked if he was full. He said ye was. I told him to be sure and get someone to help load mom if she goes to Swicegood sooner than next week. Mona was reading the obits to her when I left.
And that is how a good visit goes.
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